Father Abraham’s Blues
I’m reviving this blog. Call me crazy.
Not much new has happened here since we got back from Orchard Project in June, but we’ve been writing like crazy and probably have enough material for three shows at this point. Which means it’s time to kill some babies.
This baby was inspired by Arian’s track: birth and parenthood in the digital age.
FATHER ABRAHAM’S BLUES
My baby daughter’s eyes and weight and size can be selected
Via PDA in time to save the day and be corrected
Her DNA is mine to play with if I do elect it
And my happiness I buy over the counter and inject it
While psychiatrists whose iron fists look strangely anorexic
Show me pictures of teenagers in bikinis eating breakfast
And then ask me how it feels to be born and raised in Texas
I said, “Man I’m not from there but as for me I’m feeling restless.”
My best friend had a headache so the doctor amputated
Then they posted it on YouTube where it soon was highly rated
And professors and investors lifted glass and celebrated
As they watched their stocks in Eli Lilly rapidly inflated
While senators reached across the aisle and resonated
Until Hillary she cried out, “I have been inseminated
By a certain founding father whose name shall remain unstated.”
But soon hints were dropped that Independence he had Declarated
So geneticists sang Yankee Doodle Dandy and paraded
Down Sunset Boulevard where all the actors stopped and waited
For a speech by Mary-Ellis Bunim in which she berated
The cast of Gossip Girl who then slinked away deflated
The whole thing watched by 60 million Nielsen estimated
Before word got out that William Gates III had copulated
With the ghost of J.P. Morgan who then soon released a statement
Saying, “It’s possible. I can’t recall. I was inebriated.”
Sweet Samantha touched my knee when I was only seventeen
And it left a stain that won’t come out no matter how I clean
She said, “Come to me when you are ready and I shall receive.”
But I overslept and showed up late and now it’s only me
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